By Diala Al Aza

In the Gaza Strip where children make up more than half of the population of about two million people, the war has a more severe impact because of the major effects it has on this group for many years.

Some may ask, how can parents reduce the burden of the bombing on their children's heads? Is there even time and luxury for psychological care during war?

In this report, we will answer these questions through the testimonies of some families who have experienced repeated wars in the Strip, but the current war is “unlike it,” as many Gazans describe.

“The people of the Gaza Strip agreed on one idea: we sleep together so we can die together.”

Journalist Hanan Abu Daghim said in a brief conversation I had with her via WhatsApp that she gave up her career in these circumstances in order to stay with her children.

She added: “My house in the Al-Rimal neighborhood was severely damaged. A few days ago, I moved from it to my brother’s house, where three families spent the night together. When the bombing intensifies, the children begin to recite the Shahada. When the bombing intensifies, I gather the children and try to distract them by playing together, even though I myself need someone to calm my mind.” During the bombing, it helps me psychologically. We try to overcome the situation by telling the children: It is a crisis and it will pass, and that God is with us.”

Hanan, who appreciates the role of the journalist in these circumstances, says that she believes that the safety of her family is a priority, and she adds: “I assure you that the people of the Gaza Strip are united on one idea, which is to sleep with all of their children in the same room so that if a shell falls on the house, everyone dies.” The family is together so that no one is left alive and mourns the dead.”

“When the bombing ends, I will buy you a nice gift.”

Another mother named Sahar Kamal, who lives in Khan Yunis in the south of the Gaza Strip, has two children. When the bombing intensifies, her daughter, Rital - 4 years old - begins to complain about the annoying sound of the bombing, which causes her a headache, so Sahar promises her “a beautiful gift as soon as the situation calms down, provided that it calms down.” Sahar also tries to make funny sounds to make her two-year-old child laugh too.

Laila Muhammad, in her thirties and mother of five children, says that as a mother she feels very afraid for her children and tries to protect them inside the house, as she considers going out and being displaced “very difficult, and in this war there is no safe place at all, and through the experience of displacement in past wars, my daughter Salma still remembers these moments.” And every day she says to me, “We don’t want to leave the house. I don’t want to die outside our house.” She feels that the missiles are chasing anyone who walks in the street because we lived through these moments before, and she is afraid of that. At night, she is terrified by the sound of the planes.

A night in Gaza: “Not even candles are available”

The situation does not seem much different to Manal Salem, who says that she sits with her children in the room and they start arranging the toys so that they do not focus on the sounds of the bombing. She added: “My eldest son, Faris, who is eight years old, goes to the bathroom a lot and sometimes urinates on himself, out of extreme fear. He hates the sound of airplanes. I am waiting for things to calm down a little so that I can go to a psychologist to treat my children and get out of this situation.”

“Children’s songs were louder than the sound of missiles.”

Iman Bashir describes this war as “unlike what the Gaza Strip witnessed in previous wars.” I had spoken to Iman, a mother of three children, during the previous war on Gaza in May 2021. At that time, she informed me of some personal attempts to help her children psychologically to deal with the effects of war, such as reading stories during the bombing, and if the bombing was loud, she would turn on the loudspeakers with some children’s songs so that they would louder than the sound of the missiles outside.

But now, during this war that began on the morning of October 7, Iman says in a very brief message via WhatsApp: “This time (the war) is different, very bad. I don’t know what to do, as my husband is outside the country and I have 3 children and more.” The situation is getting worse, there is a power outage, so I don’t know what to do. Just pray for us.”

"Continuous psychological crises"

Save the Children published a report last year, presenting a comparison of the psychological state of children in the Gaza Strip in recent years, and showed that about 88 percent of children suffer from emotional disorders in 2022 compared to 55 percent in previous years, along with a number of others. Among the psychological disorders that children suffer from, the percentage of which is increasing, such as fear, anxiety, and extreme sadness, according to the report.

The Gaza Strip is among the most densely populated areas in the world, with about 2.3 million Palestinians living in an area 41 kilometers (25 miles) long and 10 kilometers wide. About 80 percent of Gaza's population depends on international aid, according to the United Nations, and about one million people depend on daily food aid.

With every war, or after it, the sector witnesses, individuals, activists, and non-profit organizations try to help children overcome the traumas they have experienced. Among them is a young activist named Ahmed Hijazi, who documents, through his accounts on social media platforms, some simple and purposeful activities with one goal: “to make the children of Gaza happy.”

But what the young man Ahmed Hijazi presented changed as soon as the war began. He began documenting the health situation of children in the Gaza Strip, whether those who had been bombed themselves or what they are experiencing these days.

Is mental health a “luxury” in times of war?

This question may come to those who live in war conditions or even to those who are watching from a distance. In light of the lack of a safe place in Gaza, where there are no shelters and the interruption of the road network as well as electricity and water, taking care of mental health seems like an unimportant luxury. But according to psychologists, what is called “psychological first aid” is beneficial in the long term, even if you follow simple steps.

One of the non-profit organizations, for example, offers advice to families and their children on Facebook. Among the advice provided by the specialists of this organization is: “Participating children in expressing their feelings helps in overcoming the loss.”

The director of the Gaza Mental Health Program, Dr. Yasser Abu Jamea, says, “Children’s cognitive abilities are not like adults, but they sense danger significantly and noticeably, just by looking into the eyes of their families, when they notice tension in adults, and of course when they hear the sounds of bombing and explosions.”

Dr. Abu Jamaa advises people in Gaza to try to reduce some habits to reduce the transfer of stress and anxiety from adults to children, saying: “Parents should reduce looking through windows, reduce following the news all the time, and involve children in searching for a safe place in the house, or Planning to move to a relative’s house. Involving children in this decision makes them feel reassured, especially when they hear the sound of explosions.”

Dr. Abu Jamaa adds that parents should try to “follow methods that contribute to ridding their children of anxiety, such as encouraging them to talk about their fears, but without resorting to providing them with false news or fake promises. It is more appropriate to talk about fear and engage with them in normal daily activities, and try to continue.” In the daily routine as much as possible.

Schools turned into shelters

Schools are usually a haven for children to meet friends, study and play in the yards, but UNRWA schools in the Gaza Strip opened their doors this year to receive displaced families. According to the latest figures issued by the agency, more than 280,000 Gazan citizens went to more than 92 schools and affiliated facilities in the Gaza Strip as of Thursday, the sixth day of the war. While thousands of others were displaced to government schools in the Strip.

The United Nations Relief and Works Agency for Refugees said that the schools and facilities where people have taken shelter are extremely overcrowded and have limited food and water supplies.

“I feel like my whole body hurts because I hide my sadness and crying from my children.”

Souad Jabr, a thirty-year-old mother from Jabalia camp in the northern Gaza Strip, says that mothers are living in a difficult situation in the war, so they must be strong in front of their children. She adds: "I feel like my whole body is hurting because of hiding my sadness and crying from my children. I feel that negative energy is causing spasms in my body's muscles and damaging my nerves. I try to be strong in front of my children."

Every mother tries to prepare a bag to store the necessary papers so that she and the children can evacuate quickly during the bombing. This is what happened with Souad Jabr, who left her house after the Al-Sikka area was bombed and then returned again to her house, which was slightly damaged, as “there is no safe place.” .